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Tool<\/a>‘s chart-topping, multi-platinum third album\u00a0Lateralus<\/em>\u00a0is largely considered one of the biggest and best metal albums of the 21st century \u2014 but\u00a0that didn’t stop a Pitchfork celebrity guest interviewer from eviscerating it in a new retrospective review.<\/p>\n Comedian and internet personality the Kid Mero (who rose to prominence co-hosting the\u00a0Desus vs. Mero<\/em> podcast alongside Desus Nice and later helmed the\u00a0Desus & Mero<\/em> talk show) offered his thoughts on the 2001 album, mincing no words in his brutal assessment as part of Pitchfork<\/a>‘s new Guest Editor series.<\/p>\n READ MORE:<\/strong>\u00a0Every Tool Song Ranked<\/a><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n “I am going to go right ahead and give that a 1.5 ’cause I hate motherfucking Tool,” Mero said right off the bat. “God damn, them motherfuckers suck, boy. Hey, have you ever listened to that shit? Like, for real, for real? If I gave you a porcupine and I was like, ‘Eat this shit alive, try to enjoy it,’ you’d be like, ‘No, there’s no way I can enjoy this, man.'”<\/p>\n “This is Tool, man. Band name says it all,” Mero continued. “I hope y’all also gave Tool a 1.”<\/p>\n The comedian was vindicated to learn that Pitchfork\u00a0awarded\u00a0Lateralus<\/em> a 1.9 out of 10 in its\u00a0original review<\/a>. (We tried to find a demonstrative pull quote, but the whole write-up is so rife with bong-hit navel-gazing that we actually have no idea what the author was trying to say.) But Mero thought that even a 1.9 was too generous.<\/p>\n READ MORE: 10 Times Danny Carey Was the Best Drummer on Earth<\/a><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n “And whoever did that was being nice. They might know Scott Stapp<\/a>,” Mero said. Then: “Oh, no, that’s the guy from Creed<\/a>. My bad. See? They’re so ass that they are interchangeable in my mind.”<\/p>\n When\u00a0a staffer informed Mero that Tool’s frontman is Maynard James Keenan<\/a>, he remarked upon the singer’s “weird-ass Civil War era name.” Then he delivered the final blow.<\/p>\n “I’m sorry, man,” he said. “If you put your heart and soul into this shit, I apologize, but this shit is ass.”<\/p>\n Mero is not\u00a0the first celebrity to voice his disdain for Tool. In 2023, comedian and podcaster Marc Maron explained<\/a>\u00a0that although he’s friends with some of the band members, he can’t get into their music.<\/p>\n “That shit’s gotta be planted young, dude,” Maron said. “If it wasn’t planted in my weird, angry, adolescent head. \u2026 That’s where it happens, but I missed all that. So, there I was, like in my 40s, kind of listening to Tool.”<\/p>\n Comedian Reggie Watts also dragged the prog-metal giants<\/a> that year.\u00a0“As much hype as they get, I just don\u2019t get it,”\u00a0he told Spin.<\/em>\u00a0“And they\u2019re also not very nice. I saw \u2019em in Big Day Out Tour, and I was trying to get side-stage, and they were giving us all this grief. It was like, you could see everybody \u2014 all the artists could see other artists from the side of the stage \u2014 but they were like, ‘No, only selected people.’ And I\u2019m just like, ‘For this, are you fucking kidding me?'”<\/p>\n Watts continued:\u00a0“I\u2019m sorry guys, but you aren\u2019t that good that you can have that kind of attitude. Ultimately no one is \u2014 although I could imagine it for Prince<\/a>, like, ‘Whatever you need, Prince.’ Totally fine. But Tool? I\u2019m like, ‘You\u2019re just math rock.”<\/p>\n The comedian also said he was unimpressed with Keenan’s voice, arguing,\u00a0“There\u2019s no presence to it. No presence. Not like\u00a0Chris Cornell<\/a>. He\u2019s a fucking rock singer. Or\u00a0Perry Farrell<\/a>: his voice. Jesus Christ \u2014 that voice is insane.”<\/p>\n Well … WE don’t hate\u00a0<\/em>Lateralus! See where we put it on our list of the 25 best metal albums of the\u00a0first 25 years of the century (2000-2024):<\/em><\/p>\n The best metal albums representing the first quarter of the 21st century.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n Gallery Credit: Loudwire Staff<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\nWhat Did the Kid Mero Say About Tool’s ‘Lateralus’?<\/h3>\n
Other Celebrities Who Hate Tool<\/h3>\n
The 25 Best Metal Albums of the Last 25 Years (2000-2024)<\/h2>\n