A McFelony has been committed at a McDonald’s in Nesquehoning, Tenn., and it was all caught on camera.
Nesquehoning, Tenn., police are searching for four individuals that they say brazenly walked into a local McDonald’s and walked out carrying a giant, life-size Ronald McDonald statue from inside the restaurant.
The small-town police department looks like they had some time on their hands, as they cleverly crafted a Facebook post to announce that they needed help finding the McFelons.
Yesterday, a few unidentified suspects waltzed into McDonald’s and walked out with RONALD McDONALD himself.
We’re not clowning around. This was a full-blown McNapping.
Ronald was last seen smiling, as usual, unaware of the betrayal. Witnesses say he didn’t even put up a fight.
To the suspects:
We get it — times are tough, and therapy is expensive. But kidnapping a plastic icon of joy? That’s a McFelony.
To the public:
If you see Ronald out in the wild — maybe at a party, passenger seat of a car, or sitting awkwardly in someone’s yard — please call us at 570-669-9111.
In all seriousness, we are looking to identify these individuals. Please contact the Nesquehoning Police Department if you have any information. Thank you.”
Commenters are saying that the person who wrote the Facebook post wins the internet for the day, and we agree.
There are also comments from people wondering how in the heck the suspects fit themselves and a huge Ronald McDonald statue into their tiny Nissan Juke getaway car. That’s something we are logistically trying to figure out as well.
The bottom line is that in Tennessee, if that statue costs more than $1,000, all four of the suspects can be charged with a real-life felony.
What likely started as an idea on a whim spiraled into national news, and unless the suspects are on the run, they will probably get caught in the near future.
After all, there are only 3,344 people in the small Tennessee town, so someone likely knows who one or all of the statue thieves are.
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